I have spent the entirety of my high school life in love. Ever since I first saw her, I felt a throbbing feeling in my chest, my adrenaline and motivation both ran high when seeing her, however in fear of being rejected, I never approached her, we've never seen eye to eye. She always seemed out of my league, however over time, the pain in my heart overtook me.

As the pain overtook me I started seeing her in different ways, I saw her as I was doing cp, I saw her when reading edi after solving problems in cp too, over time more and more, I would see her more, and this made the pain worse, at this time, I knew I should confess to her one of these days, however at the time I still could not build up such courage, so I kept quiet and the feelings continued to weight me down. Around then i learned that it was unhealthy to have feelings weighing you down, but as such a closed person, I rarely opened up to anyone. However this intense feeling overtook me once again, and half a year later, I planned to write a confession to her.

Sadly, a dark time was my third year, as I kept seeing her I started having more sexual desires with her. I wanted to Insert her, and Shift her, repeatedly. This dirty mentality made this a very dark time and I do not like to talk about it, however this also serves as an apology to her for fantasising such delusions about her. I now like her for her personalities, her features, not her body.